December 30: Today’s Reminder*
There is so much to appreciate in this life. I won’t waste another moment feeling sorry for myself. “…the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.”-Martha Washington
Last year, about this time, I was heading south to spend New Year’s weekend at home with my family, Maycee in tow, because my original plans to go out for the holiday with my boyfriend got cancelled unexpectedly. It was mixed bag of emotions during the weekend as I made last-minute new plans with my best friend, instead, who lives down in that area. I didn’t realize that New Year’s 2011 was going to be a precursor of greater disappointments to come. And, they did. One by one. Actually, it became more of a continuom of the journey that had become my life, or seemingly so.
A believer in “signs”, I’ve realized that while “signs” do exist, I cannot rely on them fully to dictate my every emotion, my every move, my every minute. Sure, 2011’s New Year’s was a semi-bust. Sure, the first five months of 2011 appeared to hold one obstacle after another…but as the year continued, and I pressed on, as we all must do to face life on life’s terms, suddenly, there was a clearing in the mist. And, then, the unexpected happened: 2011 shaped into one of the best years I’ve had in many a blue moon. Not because it was easy, and not because everything is totally hunky dory. But, simply put, I gained a small reprieve.
So, tonight, I comtemplate my “zoo”.
I took Maycee to see “We Bought A Zoo” at the local old-time theater downtown. Something within me wanted to see this movie-so much so, that after an already long day, as soon as we got home, I jumped onto my (new totally awesome) computer and checked to see where the movie was playing. Oh, my gosh, it’s playing in twenty minutes! I hollered outside to Maycee-“let’s go!” And, with only a quick potty break, we jumped into the car and joined the crowds already appearing to celebrate 2012’s pending arrival.
Now, I won’t spoil the movie for you, Readers, but I will tell you this: the main character (played by Matt Damon) is a single dad who buys an old house out in the country that is part of (you guessed it!) a zoo, and saving the zoo is part of the deal. He does this in an attempt to help his little family heal from the death of his wife, to give them new hope, and he does it on a whim. He lives his life by the motto that “sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of bravery.” I love this. I absolutely love this!
Last New Year’s Eve I began to question the “twenty seconds of bravery” (felt more like twenty seconds of insanity) that lead to my “zoo”. As the early part of 2011 unfolded, I second-guessed my decisions many times over, one to the next; however, somewhere deep down inside believing that although questioning, I was indeed making right choices. And, while my circumstances have improved in just a half a year’s time (and over the course of almost five), many of them are still very much the same. But my disposition? Well, I had to trade in my old model for a newer one. Struggle and strife had to be looked upon as challenges and opportunities. “Signs” had to be viewed and then processed without necessarily acting upon them. Trusting my inner voice again became a necessary goal.
My “zoo”, the Yellow Submarine and all its glory, along with my two rescue dogs, one Garfield-sized putty tat, two firebellied toads, four goldfish, (no partridge in a pear tree) and my beautiful Maycee-who trumps all attitudinal teenagers these days- is functioning! It’s functioning, and it’s improving! It’s improving, and I’m appreciating! I’m appreciating, and borderline enjoying! 2012, come on, come join us!
In review of the past year, here are some of my tell-taling posts that speak to the journey mentioned above:
And, pictures …
Must mentions as this year closes in:
Thank you, Mom, for everything, for loving me, for supporting me, and for being the one I can turn to above all others. Thank you, Dad, for always coming through-even when I least expect it. Thank you, my handsome man, for returning to me and for making my life richer than ever before. Thank you, my friends, my church, my co-workers, and my neighbors for being our village. Thank you, Maycee, for being the engine that keeps me runnin’, for motivating me to endure when nothing else does, for being my little girl, the light of my life. Thank you, Lord, for lessons that seem unbearable but draw me closer to You nonetheless, being a lamp unto my feet. And, thank you, Readers, for subscribing, reading, commenting, and allowing my words to have some meaning so that my head doesn’t explode.
Remember: life is short, be happy, and continue each and every day to give a chuckle in your own “zoo”. Happy New Year!
*Courage to Change